Archive for ‘6. Human Mind’

October 4, 2008

Restlessness…

 

Symptoms:
How many times have you felt restless with life. As if everything is moving away or out of your control. You are unsure of what life may throw and are uncomfortable with this unsettling part. The surprises it may have in store may not be to your liking. What if?
The funny thing is, when you try and answer the basic question; “What is it that is going wrong, what may go wrong that you are not ready for?” there is no answer.

There is another kind of restlessness, the restlessness of a searching soul. He is not wary of the surprises that life will throw, not afraid of unsettlement. The issue there is, “why is it not-happening?”. You have everything you want. You do not know what are you missing. You are happy or can not think of a reason to complain, but funny thing is you can not put your mind at one place for long. Nothing holds your attention for long, sooner or later you tend to grow weary. The continuous trial-n-error build up a talent powerhouse but it never gets applied. And the person is left wondering “Will I ever feel complete. Will I ever be able to sit and say “This is all I wanted at this moment and I just want it to stay like it is” rather than “This moment is fun but I wonder what will the next moment have in store for me.”

Source:
In one line, it emerges from not having a corner which gives you semblance of completeness. To some people it comes easy. They are either very practical people or people with strong support system. Mostly a secure and comforting parentage can lead to lowering of anxiety. Also, people with a strong Child state in them can have it plenty.
Most kids have it but as they grow, their anxieties keep getting abated as they realize themselves, find answers to most of their questions or simply stop asking. Those who do not, find themselves living an extended childhood but as they say, sooner or later everyone grows up except Peter Pan.
Restless energy can be channelized for creative pursuits or exploratory energy. Shah-rukh Khan appears to have it in abundance. Abhay Deol on the contrary had none of it.

What it can lead to if not addressed:
Long and extended periods of restlessness can lead to weariness. Restless energy has the potential to be very productive if channelized properly. If the person involved does not find a way for doing so, with time the realization of potential vs. achievement will sink in bringing in the frustration along.

What if it is addressed:
Trust in a restless soul’s ability to spring surprises. Most of the path-breaking findings are a result of such restless energy. Practical people do not look into unknown or what is not present but rather understand what is available and accept it. Such people have a continuous and steady success rate in life. They are people who make incremental improvements to life and anything they are involved in. They can be trusted and relied upon to execute a well-understood task.
Focus of restless people is in contrast to it. Their perennial search for what is missing leads to their questioning every assumption and way of doing thing. They have an unsteady success rate and it is often in leaps interspersed with long periods of stagnation and even regression.

What to do if you are a restless soul:
Restlessness emerges from the feeling of detachment with the surroundings. To curb it one needs to find something he or she feels strongly attached to. This attachment will work like an anchor for you. It could be a person to live for, an activity or a cause to work for. It should be strong enough to suck the individual’s all the scattered energy.
Finding such a person or cause may not be easy and may take longer than your imaginations. It will be advisable if you learn to act little practically till you find your alchemist.

What to do if you have a restless soul in your team:
You have to begin by understanding one thing. You can not control it, you can just guide it by gentle push in the intended direction. Put him on tasks which are unstructured. They provide him a sense of discovery which is so very dear to them. Give them flexibility and keep a check that they do not wander to far from the intended track.

What to do if you have a restless son/spouse:Again, the solution lies in understanding the person’s needs and intentions. First thing to understand is that this person’s actions are not always result of a desire for what he does not have but discontentment from what he does. He may stray or indulge in activities you do not approve of. But he/she is doing it in a vein hope to find something which will give him/her a sense of completion and put his restlessness at rest for a while. Restraining him/her from doing so will only abet his will to do so. Letting him/her do it will ensure that as soon the realization of futility of actions dawns upon him/her, they will come back to you.

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